"What On Earth Am I Here For?"
The Purpose Driven Life, and why I choose to embark upon it, is the focus of this Journal. But, why a public Journal? Indeed, why the Journey?
I write this, sitting at a Flying J Truckstop along the banks of beautiful Lake chitaqua, New York, USA in the cozy little hamlet of Corfu. Last evening, I spent some $50 as an investment in myself, and as a tithe to my Saviour. I hope to increase my faith, my ministry, and my life.
My never-ending quest to be His alone, to serve Him with my every moment, and to transparently reflect His Glory to a hurting world leads me to, once again, struggle to increase my understanding of my personal life verse, Jeremiah 1:4-9.
This book, its forty day course of study, and its insights are not new to me. I have completed the study once before, approximately one year ago. But, the things I have learned about myself, my world, and the way that I relate to both, especially over the last year, compel me to look again at Rick Waren's work with a fresh perspective and a new heart.
My previous study gave me much. I pray this second (of what may be several visits to this work) will give me much more. I am going to put my written answers, thoughts, prayers, and learning in this Blog. It will be a public Journal, and I feel a word of explanation is in order concerning this decision.
As I look out over this entrancing lake-so long a symbol of creative culture and learning, I am choosing to create a public Bog for several reasons:
1. I hope this choice will help me complete the study - well. While the entries will most probably NOT occur daily (requirements of life and work), I want to commit to at least one entry per week. The work will happen daily for each of the forty days, but computer access is painfully limited. I currently have no laptop, and may be in danger of losing my desktop (and my home) shortly. By committing to a Public Journal, I believe I will continue and complete the study regardless of location or circumstance. This is my goal, and my hope, no matter what.
2. There is within me a sense that Dad is preparing me for the next step on the Journey which HE alone ordained before I came to be. And, after years of working around what I suspected to be His purpose, I am now-I believe, in the final stages of preparation of what will be the actual doing of it. The study will lead me to the final understanding of that call, and I will be fully prepared when He sends me.
3. I want this Journal to be public. It is an exercise in "open" honesty. I am learning to accept and fully love myself as I truly am, and as I am becoming. Hopefully, a public Journal will help me externalize my discovery of the ME that God (Dad) created. As I internally grapple with these new realities, it is the writing which helps me process what I learn. It also helps to have a place to permanently put my thoughts outside my head, and I then can empty my brain in preparation for the next learning. This is, indeed, a very good and most helpful therapy. A public Journal, available to public scrutiny, is also a first for me. I have several Journals online, each dedicated to one of the several aspects of my profesional life. But, until now, I have not committed to a Journal which is devoted to a completely open, honest reflection of my personal life.
4. Like "real" life, we are forever more being observed, evaluated, and judged by those who "see" us. Most of these folks are, in no way, qualified to do so-yet they do so. As homo sapiens, we are continuously passing our judgement of each other on for reasons significant only to us. The public aspect of this Journal will, I pray, help me experience and learn of others and their observations, evaluations, and judgements of me. Regardless of the judgement, I will have a laboratory to perhaps learn how to deal appropriately with them, and my feelings and conclusions about them. I must learn to deal with the fact that judgements of me exist, and I must develop methods and choices for dealing with those judgements. Good or evil, kind or cruel, there is much for me to learn through them. IF my truest goal is to accurately learn how to live the remainder of my life with not only a purpose, but specifically God's Purpose, a public Journal can be a valuble personal tool to that end.
5. I am of no particular station, or position. I am a man. I am a Christian. I am a truck driver. I am a musician, a minister, a Philosopher, a counsellor and friend. I am a Brother, an Uncle, and Nephew. But, among these and many other defining parts of the me I see, lies the ME that God Created before the first moment of my earthly existence (Jer 1:5). To learn, and to beome THAT person is my goal for this study, and for this public Journal. Serving as a Diary of that journey, the Journal should reflect the twists and turns along the way to discovery, or so I pray.
6. Finally, the Journal will be an additional, unique resource available to me during this journey that I did NOT have available the previous time. I will not regurgitate the daily thoughts, writing assignments, or written Journal entries here. In other words, this Journal will reflect where I have gotten to on the path, not how I got there.
It will not be just a repository of "THE Sermon" that each day's study will necessarily create, yet there will be some lengthy writing. There will be questions, rants, observations, and, in effect, a bottom line to each day's work.
If you visit, I hope you will leave a comment. Let me know you passed by. Feel free to interact in whatever way you desire. Agree, or disagree; be kind, or cruel. But, please be honest; I assure you that I will be.
And if, by some strange chance, something here speaks to you in a place deep within the center of what you believe you are, please do not, do NOT confuse me with the Speaker. As I fully expect God (Dad) to communicate with me here as I take this little Journey, so I pray that, through this Journal, and the adventure it will chronicle, God may even speak to you, too.
Soli deo gloria!
M B. "Bud" Fields, Jr.
kybudman@hotmail.com
The Purpose Driven Life, and why I choose to embark upon it, is the focus of this Journal. But, why a public Journal? Indeed, why the Journey?
I write this, sitting at a Flying J Truckstop along the banks of beautiful Lake chitaqua, New York, USA in the cozy little hamlet of Corfu. Last evening, I spent some $50 as an investment in myself, and as a tithe to my Saviour. I hope to increase my faith, my ministry, and my life.
My never-ending quest to be His alone, to serve Him with my every moment, and to transparently reflect His Glory to a hurting world leads me to, once again, struggle to increase my understanding of my personal life verse, Jeremiah 1:4-9.
This book, its forty day course of study, and its insights are not new to me. I have completed the study once before, approximately one year ago. But, the things I have learned about myself, my world, and the way that I relate to both, especially over the last year, compel me to look again at Rick Waren's work with a fresh perspective and a new heart.
My previous study gave me much. I pray this second (of what may be several visits to this work) will give me much more. I am going to put my written answers, thoughts, prayers, and learning in this Blog. It will be a public Journal, and I feel a word of explanation is in order concerning this decision.
As I look out over this entrancing lake-so long a symbol of creative culture and learning, I am choosing to create a public Bog for several reasons:
1. I hope this choice will help me complete the study - well. While the entries will most probably NOT occur daily (requirements of life and work), I want to commit to at least one entry per week. The work will happen daily for each of the forty days, but computer access is painfully limited. I currently have no laptop, and may be in danger of losing my desktop (and my home) shortly. By committing to a Public Journal, I believe I will continue and complete the study regardless of location or circumstance. This is my goal, and my hope, no matter what.
2. There is within me a sense that Dad is preparing me for the next step on the Journey which HE alone ordained before I came to be. And, after years of working around what I suspected to be His purpose, I am now-I believe, in the final stages of preparation of what will be the actual doing of it. The study will lead me to the final understanding of that call, and I will be fully prepared when He sends me.
3. I want this Journal to be public. It is an exercise in "open" honesty. I am learning to accept and fully love myself as I truly am, and as I am becoming. Hopefully, a public Journal will help me externalize my discovery of the ME that God (Dad) created. As I internally grapple with these new realities, it is the writing which helps me process what I learn. It also helps to have a place to permanently put my thoughts outside my head, and I then can empty my brain in preparation for the next learning. This is, indeed, a very good and most helpful therapy. A public Journal, available to public scrutiny, is also a first for me. I have several Journals online, each dedicated to one of the several aspects of my profesional life. But, until now, I have not committed to a Journal which is devoted to a completely open, honest reflection of my personal life.
4. Like "real" life, we are forever more being observed, evaluated, and judged by those who "see" us. Most of these folks are, in no way, qualified to do so-yet they do so. As homo sapiens, we are continuously passing our judgement of each other on for reasons significant only to us. The public aspect of this Journal will, I pray, help me experience and learn of others and their observations, evaluations, and judgements of me. Regardless of the judgement, I will have a laboratory to perhaps learn how to deal appropriately with them, and my feelings and conclusions about them. I must learn to deal with the fact that judgements of me exist, and I must develop methods and choices for dealing with those judgements. Good or evil, kind or cruel, there is much for me to learn through them. IF my truest goal is to accurately learn how to live the remainder of my life with not only a purpose, but specifically God's Purpose, a public Journal can be a valuble personal tool to that end.
5. I am of no particular station, or position. I am a man. I am a Christian. I am a truck driver. I am a musician, a minister, a Philosopher, a counsellor and friend. I am a Brother, an Uncle, and Nephew. But, among these and many other defining parts of the me I see, lies the ME that God Created before the first moment of my earthly existence (Jer 1:5). To learn, and to beome THAT person is my goal for this study, and for this public Journal. Serving as a Diary of that journey, the Journal should reflect the twists and turns along the way to discovery, or so I pray.
6. Finally, the Journal will be an additional, unique resource available to me during this journey that I did NOT have available the previous time. I will not regurgitate the daily thoughts, writing assignments, or written Journal entries here. In other words, this Journal will reflect where I have gotten to on the path, not how I got there.
It will not be just a repository of "THE Sermon" that each day's study will necessarily create, yet there will be some lengthy writing. There will be questions, rants, observations, and, in effect, a bottom line to each day's work.
If you visit, I hope you will leave a comment. Let me know you passed by. Feel free to interact in whatever way you desire. Agree, or disagree; be kind, or cruel. But, please be honest; I assure you that I will be.
And if, by some strange chance, something here speaks to you in a place deep within the center of what you believe you are, please do not, do NOT confuse me with the Speaker. As I fully expect God (Dad) to communicate with me here as I take this little Journey, so I pray that, through this Journal, and the adventure it will chronicle, God may even speak to you, too.
Soli deo gloria!
M B. "Bud" Fields, Jr.
kybudman@hotmail.com
posted by Budroe | 12:43 PM
